Just a question... While @ a Networking Event, have you ever thought of ...actually Networking? and by that I mean - are you actually there to exchange business referrals needed and CONNECT and helping coming up with ideas to support and grow one another's business' together?

In the past I went to business networking events daily - sometimes 2 and 3 in a day! In the past this worked for me. It worked for the name and brand recognition, meeting and building great strategic referral partners, and sometimes even meeting people who are willing to stop talking about themselves for 2 minutes and let me know how they can support my business and goals as I was for them. It was always fun yet to the point and we knew what we were there for - to CONNECT!

These were great times when people would thumb through their cell phones for you for contacts that might work well with and or for you. Fellow networkers would write down what you were looking for as you are talking to them or the group in turn reminding them to find your chosen lead, referral, or contact at a later time whether it be for business, social or for your charity that you may be supporting at that time.

Of course, their has always been the cereal business card bandit - or as I like to refer to them; as someone who struggles with the CBCB's - The one who approaches you in the middle of a great conversation with someone else and shoves their business card in your face and then on to the next victim... and the next - and the next! I actually get great humor out of these people now... I almost wait and look for them in the crowd - No, really... I do!

OK, Back to my point - When your coming to a business networking event - Do you have the right mindset or are you thinking to yourself - "I am going to tell everyone everything about me - sell my goods, services, and products and everyone is going to love ME and what I have to offer and MY company"!!!??? Hopefully you answered no to this! The correct and (should be) obvious answer would be that you come out to networking events to meet great like minded professionals who you might be able to do some great things with and even for now and in the future. This could be your business, someone else's business, someones charity or cause, a great referral to your friends restuarant, anything - just CONNECTING!!!! The point is to CONNECT in someway shape or form. Your business will be conducted with this person (if your good) somewhere down the line if not with or for someone around them because of this CONNECTION you have made. So, with that in mind - there is no need to struggle with the CBCB's. Meet and greet - learn and grow - and most importantly - CONNECT!

As of late - Networking is not a big part of my marketing approach anymore. But, for those of you that it is - There are many great ways to build strategic business relationships with your fellow networkers at these upcoming events.

The problem is: I never see actual referrals passed anymore - Numbers and names written down for each other. I do not attend business networking events to talk about business being down and gas prices going up. In all my time of networking both attending events and hosting, from business to charity to fun and social events... I have never seen such a drought of business being handed or even the effort of business being handed to one another...

I am going to pass on some advice on what to do at events and what NOT to do at events:

• Loosen up a bit - We are all @ the networking events for the same reason - To CONNECT! It's like the High School dance... don't be a wall - flower (and no, I am not saying that everyone at the High School dance was there for the same reasons lol)
• Be prepared (with pen, paper for taking notes on people's asks and how you can support and refer business to them, possibly a name tag, and always your business cards) - These really sound obvious but you would be surprised! This actually will make you feel much more on top of your game and confident!
• Find your "home" at the event - Your "safe zone" or your landing spot when the event is called to order. This is the place or the seat/table where you are going to end up so make sure to place your things there first thing freeing up your hands to grab your business cards and for a nice firm handshake... maybe even some finger food or a drink.
• Approach people who are NOT already talking to people with confidence. Look them in the eye and tell them who you are and they should do they same with you. Then the conversation starts.
• Ask Interesting questions learning about things that nobody else in the group will know about them. Everyone knows what their name is and what their business is (name tag) but ask things about family, hobbies, success, passions, etc so you can then introduce them to the next fellow networker with something interesting as well making you appear that (and hopefully you truly do) care and am in turn - interested!
• Use examples when talking about your business and what you do. Don't just give the generic explanation of your field of work - Give an example of what you do and whom you do it for and why. Ex: "I provide the title insurance and closings for Real Estate and Mortgage Professionals Transactions... so, when you bought, sold, or refinanced your home - I was the one who gave you carpal tunnel from signing all the documents and we are the legal aspect making sure that home is squared away with taxes, liens, and said ownership for your protection." Something along those lines.
• NEVER shove your business card in people's face! NEVER! Only hand it out when the time is right - When asked for or when you have connected in someway during the conversation.
• Make sure to take notes on key words that trigger your brain from what that person has said they do and are looking for. I always look back at my notes from every event all week long and find ways to refer, support, or advise the people I met at the events through follow up, in turn - building a great relationship.
• Stay Positive! Even if your numbers are down and your not where you want to be in the given quarter - Nobody wants to hear about that - They want to learn about you, your business, and your success! Nobody wants to refer business to someone who is doing lousy in their business that they barely even know on top of that. You are there at the event as the face of your business / your company! You have to make your profession / your company look like your kickin' ass out there and you will do the same for the people you are meeting at the events!
• Don't veer off into the social world of networking while at a business networking event! That is my biggest pet pieve! You are there for a short time and taking away from other things that you could be doing or catching up on! That's HUGE! Get to the point and learn what you can do for the people you meet and educate them on what and how they can do for you!
• Follow Up is Key! Whatever works for you whether it be email, snail mail, thank you cards, drop in visits, invites to other events or websites, phone calls, whatever it may be that works for you - you must follow up because that 1 minute conversation that you had and business card exchange before the event was called to order and then returning back to your "home" to never see that person again at the event is soon to be forgotten for sure!

The reason I put this blog together is simply because business networking events today have changed from what they were even a year ago! Pulling from the bullet points above - Stay Positive - there are soooo many times all I hear about from everyone is that the economy is bad, gas prices are killing them, their scared, etc etc... ok, we all have that on our minds and let's be honest - there is nothing we can do about any of that in a 1, 2, 3 hour networking event. The best we can do is meet some amazing people, learn about some amazing people, support some amazing people, and build and grow relationships with amazing people that know and have relationships with other amazing people making a change for the better in our business, charities, families, lives, etc etc...

So, I close with a quote that I try to live by and want to pass it on for you to think about and try and live by as well:

"Be the Change you wish to see in the World" ...Gandhi

Thanks for your time,

Keith Stonehouse